29 March 2024....... A date forever engraved in my memory, an announcement like this one is like being hit by the ghost train from Ghostbuster.
we're blown away by a lack of understanding and we ask ourselves 1001 questions about what's happening to us.....
When we arrive in the waiting room, we still don't know the name of this ‘extra’ thing we have, we just know that it's dangerous, but how dangerous? ....
the wait is endless !!!!
After several days in hospital, I was discharged from Amiens University Hospital, awaiting a response to the analysis of the biopsy performed during the first few days of my stay.
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Without going into too much detail, I had a biopsy of the tumour and an Ommaya reservoir fitted, which will allow me to puncture cerebrospinal fluid again if necessary.
Yes, because the tumour (the red dot) was preventing the cerebrospinal fluid from circulating through the aqueduct of Sylvius (the yellow line).
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J'ai donc rendez vous avec le responsable du service neurochirurgie, une semaine plus tard.
March 29, 2024, and here we are, heading for the hospital.
It's quite surprising when you look at a hospital, all these people milling about, coming from everywhere and nowhere at the same time.
Each person has their own story, their own worries, more or less serious, but when you think about it, a hospital is a minimalist representation of our world: we live there, we work there, we give birth there and for the vast majority of us, we die there......a tiny city in the image of our civilisation....in short, here we are with my husband in front of the entrance to this medical city...
"It's funny, but this entrance hall reminds me of the teleporter in Star Trek..."
So my husband and I enter the waiting room, and you can see the anxiety and fear on the faces of the patients with us......it's not very reassuring...!!!!
It's a long wait, and we're several minutes past our appointment time. I suppose our doctor takes his time with each patient, which is a good thing, isn't it?
‘Mrs Sinoquet!!!
Here we are.....
We enter his surgery, it's very plain, nothing personal, I wonder if it's his office at all, but anyway, he asks us to sit down....
First, the doctor explains what he did to me during my hospitalisation, I think he's making sure I've understood.
Then I noticed that his face was getting tense, he was looking at his screen, he must be looking for words....
He starts by explaining why the biopsy results took so long, and then he throws out the name ‘Glioma’. I don't understand, I don't know what this tumour is, but I can see that my husband understands, he's asking questions, I can't hear anything, I'm not listening any more, I'm a bit out of it, and from that moment on, it's my husband who'll be in charge of understanding, because I think I've disconnected my desire to understand..... After this slap, we were invited to see a psychologist, I think to assess our state of mind, I broke down, I cried because I was afraid for my husband and my children, I was afraid of inflicting stress on them and putting them through a difficult ordeal every day....
Then my husband collapses in front of a stranger, he's not used to giving himself up like that..... I realise at that moment that it's serious.
Now that the disease is here, and it has a name, what next? How do we explain it to the children and those around us?
For the time being, we'll stop thinking about it, we'll stay vague for the children, my husband and I need to be together.
Let's give it time,
today was a very bad day.....